There are somethings we shouldn’t look at, but we can’t help ourselves. Thanks to this link from Victor Lams I now have entered the bizarre world of golden teeth and the people who want them. I have five golden crowned molars..........and why anyone would want dental gold (or platinum?) flashing in the front of his mouth totally escapes me. I think I seen somewhere about people who practice a kind of scrimshaw technique on living teeth. That’s sick, too.
Wednesday, January 08, 2003
DECORATION ONLY, NOT A CHILD’S TOY
My nominee for the phrase that should be banished from the English language. It is stamped on the back of everything. Does anyone pay attention to this? The old-school decorations from my childhood going all the way back to my great-grandfather’s miniature sleigh with Father Christmas and eight worse for the wear celluloid reindeer are blessedly free from this warning.
The last straw was seeing this on the back of my package of 75 brass ornament hooks. Ornament hooks alone aren’t even a decent decoration, let alone one that could be mistaken for a toy. This must be in a tie in the legal caveat sweepstakes with my sister’s cocktail napkin with a decorative island map that said, “not for navigational purposes.”
My nominee for the phrase that should be banished from the English language. It is stamped on the back of everything. Does anyone pay attention to this? The old-school decorations from my childhood going all the way back to my great-grandfather’s miniature sleigh with Father Christmas and eight worse for the wear celluloid reindeer are blessedly free from this warning.
The last straw was seeing this on the back of my package of 75 brass ornament hooks. Ornament hooks alone aren’t even a decent decoration, let alone one that could be mistaken for a toy. This must be in a tie in the legal caveat sweepstakes with my sister’s cocktail napkin with a decorative island map that said, “not for navigational purposes.”
SMITHs in Fashion......
Anna Nicole made it to the top of the worst dressed list. "Anna's fashion follies are the worst of the year ... don't bother with a new designer, Anna, just hire a structural engineer!"
Ellyn stays at the top of the bland list. You know, the people so bland that no one bothers to make a real list. Though Britain’s Princess Anne - 5th place on Blackwell’s list - may be a threat:
"Her Royal Dowager Drag is dreary, drab and dour."
WORST DRESSED OF 2002
1. Anna Nicole Smith
2. Kelly Osbourne
3. Shakira
4. Cameron Diaz
5. Princess Anne
6. Anne Rice
7. Donatella Versace
8. Meg Ryan
9. Christina Aguilera
10. Pink
But that’s OK. Would it be libelous to say the other nine women on Mr. Blackwell’s list made it there by shear dint of skankiness?
Anna Nicole made it to the top of the worst dressed list. "Anna's fashion follies are the worst of the year ... don't bother with a new designer, Anna, just hire a structural engineer!"
Ellyn stays at the top of the bland list. You know, the people so bland that no one bothers to make a real list. Though Britain’s Princess Anne - 5th place on Blackwell’s list - may be a threat:
"Her Royal Dowager Drag is dreary, drab and dour."
WORST DRESSED OF 2002
1. Anna Nicole Smith
2. Kelly Osbourne
3. Shakira
4. Cameron Diaz
5. Princess Anne
6. Anne Rice
7. Donatella Versace
8. Meg Ryan
9. Christina Aguilera
10. Pink
But that’s OK. Would it be libelous to say the other nine women on Mr. Blackwell’s list made it there by shear dint of skankiness?
So Much Real Work to Do
But I can't resist the urge to mention (inspired by the History Channel playing in the unavoidable background) that I saw General Moncalm's skull. In a box. In a convent/museum in Quebec. The kids wait for me to mention that every time we watch last of the Mohicans. I may as well punish all of you with that knowledge, too. So what did General Montcalm look like? A skull. He wasn't wearing a General's hat.......memento mori alert - Generals (from all armies) and their infantry all look alike after 200 years.
But I can't resist the urge to mention (inspired by the History Channel playing in the unavoidable background) that I saw General Moncalm's skull. In a box. In a convent/museum in Quebec. The kids wait for me to mention that every time we watch last of the Mohicans. I may as well punish all of you with that knowledge, too. So what did General Montcalm look like? A skull. He wasn't wearing a General's hat.......memento mori alert - Generals (from all armies) and their infantry all look alike after 200 years.
Tuesday, January 07, 2003
A New Fun Thing
Dover Books now has eCards. Over a thousand images from their collections of postcards.......
Dover Books now has eCards. Over a thousand images from their collections of postcards.......
Striking a little to close to (our occasionally frog/mouse/otherwise invaded) home:
From Rod Dreher on NRO’s The Corner....... this list of Reasons Why Homeschooling Is Like Owning A Pet Rat:
1. Most people would never consider doing it.
2. To many people, it just doesn't seem right somehow.
3. Well, that's OK for your family, but we could never do it....
4. Is that legal?
5. You must be weird.
6. People hope you don't bring it up in conversation.
7. There are stereotypical images of both:
Rats smell, bite, are creepy; homeschoolers are
fundamentalists who stay home all day and shelter their children from the world.
8. Everyone has a horror story to share:
Rats as big as cats attacking people; children held against
their will and abused by fanatic parents.
9. There is a suspicion you are irresponsible:
Aren't you afraid they will escape/bite/attract wild rodents?
Aren't you afraid they won't learn to socialize/read/function?
10. Family members will forward articles about:
how animals make people sick; how homeschooling is
anti-American and undemocratic.
11. You will be given gifts of workbooks/Lysol.
12. No matter how much you love spending time with your homeschooled child/pet rat, you will never convince anyone to try it themselves.
13. Friends and family will talk about you behind your back.
From Rod Dreher on NRO’s The Corner....... this list of Reasons Why Homeschooling Is Like Owning A Pet Rat:
1. Most people would never consider doing it.
2. To many people, it just doesn't seem right somehow.
3. Well, that's OK for your family, but we could never do it....
4. Is that legal?
5. You must be weird.
6. People hope you don't bring it up in conversation.
7. There are stereotypical images of both:
Rats smell, bite, are creepy; homeschoolers are
fundamentalists who stay home all day and shelter their children from the world.
8. Everyone has a horror story to share:
Rats as big as cats attacking people; children held against
their will and abused by fanatic parents.
9. There is a suspicion you are irresponsible:
Aren't you afraid they will escape/bite/attract wild rodents?
Aren't you afraid they won't learn to socialize/read/function?
10. Family members will forward articles about:
how animals make people sick; how homeschooling is
anti-American and undemocratic.
11. You will be given gifts of workbooks/Lysol.
12. No matter how much you love spending time with your homeschooled child/pet rat, you will never convince anyone to try it themselves.
13. Friends and family will talk about you behind your back.
I Just Called to Say I Love Me
That, and much more, can be found in Victor Lams continued discussion of contemporary Church music, etc. He expresses what I’ve been thinking in a much more coherent and literate manner than I ever could.
(I have limited musical education and can basically just whine, “I know what I don’t like!)
And I just couldn’t resist repeating that title - I’ve been humming it and laughing to myself all day. Perhaps I will switch to “Isn’t I Lovely?” tomorrow while performing my toilette.
I do have great discomfort singing songs in the ‘vox dei.’ I realize that this can be totally appropriate, as another blogger mentioned, in the recitation of the Psalms, for instance. But I think the difference is that most average people in the pew don’t realize what they are singing and why, and it starts to have an influence on their attitudes.....We're singing to praise God. So many of the tunes Greg mentions ("On Eagle's Wings", "Be Not Afraid", etc.) are I songs which are venerating only the congregation. Anytime you put in the first person to represent the Lord, you're at risk of doing that -- and if you don't doubt this, walk up to your spouse or loved one and sing to them (doing your best Stevie Wonder impersonation) "I Am the Sunshine of my Life" or "Isn't I Lovely?" or "I Just Called To Say I Love Me" and see what their reaction is. You wouldn't do it to your wife, so why are you doing it to Jesus? These songs, and songs like them (paricularly any which refer to the congration, ie. "we", as any sort of "people" of "justice") bring about an attitude of liturgical masturbation in the congregation: we're no longer praising God but stroking our own egos. And in the past God's been fairly clear about what he thinks about that sort of behavior.
As for Victor’s worries that his children will have to be subjected to music more simplistic than that heard on The Wiggles or Bear in the Big Blue House, I think that is going to change. And I am hopeful that the generation that loves Bob the Builder will help lead us back to a time of more reverent ecclesiastical architecture. Can we do it? Yes, we can!
That, and much more, can be found in Victor Lams continued discussion of contemporary Church music, etc. He expresses what I’ve been thinking in a much more coherent and literate manner than I ever could.
(I have limited musical education and can basically just whine, “I know what I don’t like!)
And I just couldn’t resist repeating that title - I’ve been humming it and laughing to myself all day. Perhaps I will switch to “Isn’t I Lovely?” tomorrow while performing my toilette.
I do have great discomfort singing songs in the ‘vox dei.’ I realize that this can be totally appropriate, as another blogger mentioned, in the recitation of the Psalms, for instance. But I think the difference is that most average people in the pew don’t realize what they are singing and why, and it starts to have an influence on their attitudes.....We're singing to praise God. So many of the tunes Greg mentions ("On Eagle's Wings", "Be Not Afraid", etc.) are I songs which are venerating only the congregation. Anytime you put in the first person to represent the Lord, you're at risk of doing that -- and if you don't doubt this, walk up to your spouse or loved one and sing to them (doing your best Stevie Wonder impersonation) "I Am the Sunshine of my Life" or "Isn't I Lovely?" or "I Just Called To Say I Love Me" and see what their reaction is. You wouldn't do it to your wife, so why are you doing it to Jesus? These songs, and songs like them (paricularly any which refer to the congration, ie. "we", as any sort of "people" of "justice") bring about an attitude of liturgical masturbation in the congregation: we're no longer praising God but stroking our own egos. And in the past God's been fairly clear about what he thinks about that sort of behavior.
As for Victor’s worries that his children will have to be subjected to music more simplistic than that heard on The Wiggles or Bear in the Big Blue House, I think that is going to change. And I am hopeful that the generation that loves Bob the Builder will help lead us back to a time of more reverent ecclesiastical architecture. Can we do it? Yes, we can!
Dude, where’s my towel?.......
Just when I had forgotten about my missing Greetings from Asbury Park beach towel, The Mighty Barrister reopened the case with his mention of Bruce Springsteen’s Grammy nomination for album of the year for The Rising. There isn't a single song on The Rising that could hold a candle to the worst song on Greetings from Asbury Park. Not one. I’ll yield to his judgement on this one. I haven’t heard all of The Rising. That little Sunny Day tune is catchy, but almost cookie-cutterish enough to put him in danger of becoming another John Foggerty plagerizing himself. It’s funny that I would be thinking about this. I missed hearing the Grammy nominations, but I was listening to Bruce on the radio on my way to and from Mass. Tenth Avenue Freeze Out on the way to town; that Sunny Day song on the way back. Old Bruce is better. Put on The Wild, The Innocent, and the E Street Shuffle to expedite the deconstruction of the Christmas tree.
And reflecting upon the the Barrister’s comments about has-beens Elton John, N-Sync, Bon Jovi, and Rod Stewart got at least one nomination each, perhaps the time has come for the Grammy folks to make has been an official category.
Just when I had forgotten about my missing Greetings from Asbury Park beach towel, The Mighty Barrister reopened the case with his mention of Bruce Springsteen’s Grammy nomination for album of the year for The Rising. There isn't a single song on The Rising that could hold a candle to the worst song on Greetings from Asbury Park. Not one. I’ll yield to his judgement on this one. I haven’t heard all of The Rising. That little Sunny Day tune is catchy, but almost cookie-cutterish enough to put him in danger of becoming another John Foggerty plagerizing himself. It’s funny that I would be thinking about this. I missed hearing the Grammy nominations, but I was listening to Bruce on the radio on my way to and from Mass. Tenth Avenue Freeze Out on the way to town; that Sunny Day song on the way back. Old Bruce is better. Put on The Wild, The Innocent, and the E Street Shuffle to expedite the deconstruction of the Christmas tree.
And reflecting upon the the Barrister’s comments about has-beens Elton John, N-Sync, Bon Jovi, and Rod Stewart got at least one nomination each, perhaps the time has come for the Grammy folks to make has been an official category.
Dude, there may be a danger........
in getting too much of our theology from High Times. What I think I smell here (much like the cloud that hung over my college dorm) is a sense that cannabis is what made Jesus great, rather than the only slightly less dubious divine endorsement of cannabis use.
Jesus was almost certainly a cannabis user and an early proponent of the medicinal properties of the drug, according to a study of scriptural texts published this month. The study suggests that Jesus and his disciples used the drug to carry out miraculous healings.
The anointing oil used by Jesus and his disciples contained an ingredient called kaneh-bosem which has since been identified as cannabis extract, according to an article by Chris Bennett in the drugs magazine, High Times, entitled Was Jesus a Stoner? The incense used by Jesus in ceremonies also contained a cannabis extract, suggests Mr Bennett, who quotes scholars to back his claims.
I think there probably are legitimate (ie. medical) uses for cannabis - or THC, but let’s keep it real folks.
in getting too much of our theology from High Times. What I think I smell here (much like the cloud that hung over my college dorm) is a sense that cannabis is what made Jesus great, rather than the only slightly less dubious divine endorsement of cannabis use.
Jesus was almost certainly a cannabis user and an early proponent of the medicinal properties of the drug, according to a study of scriptural texts published this month. The study suggests that Jesus and his disciples used the drug to carry out miraculous healings.
The anointing oil used by Jesus and his disciples contained an ingredient called kaneh-bosem which has since been identified as cannabis extract, according to an article by Chris Bennett in the drugs magazine, High Times, entitled Was Jesus a Stoner? The incense used by Jesus in ceremonies also contained a cannabis extract, suggests Mr Bennett, who quotes scholars to back his claims.
I think there probably are legitimate (ie. medical) uses for cannabis - or THC, but let’s keep it real folks.
Why....
am I playing with the computer at 10:00am on a school day? Dad is at the library with "Rod & Todd."
I could be taking down the Christmas tree, but I choose not to. Deconstructing an exquisite piece of organic art is such a ponderous and melancholy task. And I wouldn't dare try to foist the job on anyone else, because I am a tad anal when it comes to my ornaments. Some are old, maybe even of some monetary value, some are just plain 'unique,' and all have such a significance to me that I do not wish to give anyone else the responsibility of tissue-wrapping and filing them all away. But the job should be done soon. The tree feels a bit dry and the clip-on ornaments are starting to contort themselves into odd positions. (The clip-on pink flamingo turned itself upside so often during the first 24 hours that the tree was up that I just gave up and let it hang......) On the plus side, now's the time to start putting up the Mardi Gras decorations. Nothing banishes the blues from taking away the Christmas stuff like draping the porch in purple, gold and green. The girls beg to differ, which makes it even more satisfying for me. (ie - we're the only people on our block - maybe in our town - who put up Mardi Gras decorations. I say, if the rest of the folks around here don't want to recognize "carnival season," too bad!) Laisser les bon temps roulez.
am I playing with the computer at 10:00am on a school day? Dad is at the library with "Rod & Todd."
I could be taking down the Christmas tree, but I choose not to. Deconstructing an exquisite piece of organic art is such a ponderous and melancholy task. And I wouldn't dare try to foist the job on anyone else, because I am a tad anal when it comes to my ornaments. Some are old, maybe even of some monetary value, some are just plain 'unique,' and all have such a significance to me that I do not wish to give anyone else the responsibility of tissue-wrapping and filing them all away. But the job should be done soon. The tree feels a bit dry and the clip-on ornaments are starting to contort themselves into odd positions. (The clip-on pink flamingo turned itself upside so often during the first 24 hours that the tree was up that I just gave up and let it hang......) On the plus side, now's the time to start putting up the Mardi Gras decorations. Nothing banishes the blues from taking away the Christmas stuff like draping the porch in purple, gold and green. The girls beg to differ, which makes it even more satisfying for me. (ie - we're the only people on our block - maybe in our town - who put up Mardi Gras decorations. I say, if the rest of the folks around here don't want to recognize "carnival season," too bad!) Laisser les bon temps roulez.
If......
nuns cut from the same cloth as Rabbi Cohen had been running my alma mater maybe it would still be a Catholic women’s college, instead of a small liberal arts school with a saint’s name that has become a subsidiary of a larger Catholic university with a saint’s name. (names are withheld to protect the innocent.)
A Sydney rabbi has been given his marching orders, on the grounds he is too religious.
Rabbi Yehuda Cohen has been sacked from his position as spiritual guide to the Jewish-run Sir Moses Montefiore aged-care facility in Hunters Hill but the Montefiore board has yet to succeed in evicting him from the facility's adjoining residence.
The rabbi told The Australian Jewish News last year that he was merely attempting to instil "a spirit of Jewishness" in the place.
nuns cut from the same cloth as Rabbi Cohen had been running my alma mater maybe it would still be a Catholic women’s college, instead of a small liberal arts school with a saint’s name that has become a subsidiary of a larger Catholic university with a saint’s name. (names are withheld to protect the innocent.)
A Sydney rabbi has been given his marching orders, on the grounds he is too religious.
Rabbi Yehuda Cohen has been sacked from his position as spiritual guide to the Jewish-run Sir Moses Montefiore aged-care facility in Hunters Hill but the Montefiore board has yet to succeed in evicting him from the facility's adjoining residence.
The rabbi told The Australian Jewish News last year that he was merely attempting to instil "a spirit of Jewishness" in the place.
Monday, January 06, 2003
Now I’m Really Glad I Didn’t Grab Play......
to throw on the CD player at work.
I like his music, but I don’t think I could be in the same room with him for more than 90 seconds.
"It almost seems like Bush is doing everything he can to taunt Saddam," writes Moby, whose real name is Richard Melville Hall, tracing his ancestry back to Herman Melville, author of the classic whale epic "Moby Dick."
to throw on the CD player at work.
I like his music, but I don’t think I could be in the same room with him for more than 90 seconds.
"It almost seems like Bush is doing everything he can to taunt Saddam," writes Moby, whose real name is Richard Melville Hall, tracing his ancestry back to Herman Melville, author of the classic whale epic "Moby Dick."
A New Low
In a desperate attempt to help the boys remember the order of columns, I stooped to a dreadful acronym as a mnemonic device. (I used to have trouble remembering which comes first, Doric or Ionic, so I sympathize.) OK, kids, it's Doric, Ionic, Corinthian. They laughed a lot, but they also remember their columns. It would have saved me a lot of trouble if I had shown up for art history tests chanting, "dic, dic, dic."
In a desperate attempt to help the boys remember the order of columns, I stooped to a dreadful acronym as a mnemonic device. (I used to have trouble remembering which comes first, Doric or Ionic, so I sympathize.) OK, kids, it's Doric, Ionic, Corinthian. They laughed a lot, but they also remember their columns. It would have saved me a lot of trouble if I had shown up for art history tests chanting, "dic, dic, dic."
Where Can We Buy Some?
This could be a great help to mothers. I wouldn’t mind if the kids behind the counter at Taco Bell were using it, too.
A hospital has reduced infections by a third after introducing soap that dyes doctors' hands if they fail to wash them properly.
Areas that are not clean show up as white patches when the hands are put under ultraviolet light.
This could be a great help to mothers. I wouldn’t mind if the kids behind the counter at Taco Bell were using it, too.
A hospital has reduced infections by a third after introducing soap that dyes doctors' hands if they fail to wash them properly.
Areas that are not clean show up as white patches when the hands are put under ultraviolet light.
Finally.......
Now I can go to work with a clear conscience. I took this test this morning (thanks to a link from And Then?) and I came up some sort of Buddhist. And only 65% Catholic. I think I was clicking poorly (not enough caffeine?) - because when I did it just now, giving the same answers, I am 100% Catholic. I sulked away to Mass, after depositing Martha at the high school. Father blessed my chalk. The door blessing went well - even with Rick pushing his luck by standing on an ice coated chair to mark the sliding door to the deck. The only chalk I had was red - hope it doesn't stain. (Not that it would bother me much, but the '03 would have to be obliterated next year.)
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Now I can go to work with a clear conscience. I took this test this morning (thanks to a link from And Then?) and I came up some sort of Buddhist. And only 65% Catholic. I think I was clicking poorly (not enough caffeine?) - because when I did it just now, giving the same answers, I am 100% Catholic. I sulked away to Mass, after depositing Martha at the high school. Father blessed my chalk. The door blessing went well - even with Rick pushing his luck by standing on an ice coated chair to mark the sliding door to the deck. The only chalk I had was red - hope it doesn't stain. (Not that it would bother me much, but the '03 would have to be obliterated next year.)
Sunday, January 05, 2003
New Year’s Resolution - Hard Work and Rapacious Ambition
Like Eric Johnson of Catholic Light, I had a suspicion of blogging Not very long ago, I was suspicious of blogs. ........I figured most blogs are junk.
And they are. Most blogs are self-indulgent, masturbatory junk, emanations from people who couldn't get published anywhere else.
I jumped in with enthusiasm anyway. If only as an exercise in writing, which I do occassionally and with slow, deliberate loathing. Daily blogging has removed the loathing and I certainly have gotten over the slow and deliberate problem. So, if only for my own mental stretching, like an ungainly, portly and aged ballerina, I keep on blogging. I’ve grown acccustomed to my own little domain of self-indulgent, masturbatory junk.
Latching on to some small memories of people who have implied that I should someday attempt professional writing, I am also buoyed by Mr. Johnson’s definition of what separates small time theatrical talent from the ‘stars’ : hard work and rapacious ambition.
..... famous actors are famous not because they are talented, but because of brutally hard work and rapacious ambition. There is no other explanation: normal people can't compete because they prioritize their lives differently: they might consider their work to be important, but as one important thing among several. Perhaps this will have to be the year I adopt brutally hard work and rapacious ambition as my goal. Hard work shouldn’t be too difficult - most mothers are already accustomed to a certain level of brutally hard work . Rapacious ambition may be a bit trickier. Time to look in the Yellow Pages for a ‘life coach.’
PS - Does a modest portfolio of cranky letters published in the Chicago Tribune qualify me as published?
Like Eric Johnson of Catholic Light, I had a suspicion of blogging Not very long ago, I was suspicious of blogs. ........I figured most blogs are junk.
And they are. Most blogs are self-indulgent, masturbatory junk, emanations from people who couldn't get published anywhere else.
I jumped in with enthusiasm anyway. If only as an exercise in writing, which I do occassionally and with slow, deliberate loathing. Daily blogging has removed the loathing and I certainly have gotten over the slow and deliberate problem. So, if only for my own mental stretching, like an ungainly, portly and aged ballerina, I keep on blogging. I’ve grown acccustomed to my own little domain of self-indulgent, masturbatory junk.
Latching on to some small memories of people who have implied that I should someday attempt professional writing, I am also buoyed by Mr. Johnson’s definition of what separates small time theatrical talent from the ‘stars’ : hard work and rapacious ambition.
PS - Does a modest portfolio of cranky letters published in the Chicago Tribune qualify me as published?
Christus Mansionem Benedicat
Found several interesting sites while looking up more door blessing info for my friend. Some articles say the chalk should be blessed. Will attempt to get chalk blessed after Mass tomorrow. I'll bring her different chalk if possible. The way I've been losing things lately, I decided to put the chalk in my purse now - so I can't leave home without it. Then I'll put mine in a safe [but not too safe] place so I have it for next year, too.
Found several interesting sites while looking up more door blessing info for my friend. Some articles say the chalk should be blessed. Will attempt to get chalk blessed after Mass tomorrow. I'll bring her different chalk if possible. The way I've been losing things lately, I decided to put the chalk in my purse now - so I can't leave home without it. Then I'll put mine in a safe [but not too safe] place so I have it for next year, too.
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