Achtung Baby!

or

"SOY SAUCE! SOY SAUCE! SHE'S COVERED MY PARIS GOWN IN SOY SAUCE!!

Embot’s beloved Edward told me that heretofore unsalvageable CD’s can be redeemed by gently massaging - in an eliptical motion - with Brasso metal polish. I finally remembered to purchase some Brasso (not actually owning any, since I polish all my copper with a homeade concoction of generic catsup and kosher salt) and decided to try it on a hopeless copy of U2’s Achtung Baby. As I started, while the potent fumes tickled my nostrils, I had visions of Mary Tyler Moore’s character in Thoroughly Modern Millie believing the evil Mrs. Meers explanation of soy sauce as a stain remover. What if this was some big joke? But no, Edward C. would not steer me wrong. It worked. It really worked. I wonder if the Brasso people know about this ‘off label’ use of their product....