If We Only Were Back in the 1960’s....
this could be the inspiration of a great sitcom.
NEW SQUARE, N.Y. - And so it came to pass that a talking carp, shouting in Hebrew, shattered the calm of the New Square Fish Market and created what many here are calling a miracle.......

"It said `Tzaruch shemirah' and `Hasof bah,' " he said, "which essentially means everyone needs to account for themselves, because the end is near."

The fish commanded Rosen to pray and to study the Torah and identified itself as the soul of a local Hasidic man who died last year, childless. The man often bought carp at the shop for the Sabbath meals of poorer village residents.

Rosen panicked and tried to kill the fish with a machete-size knife. But the fish bucked so wildly that Rosen wound up cutting his own thumb and was taken to the hospital by ambulance. The fish flopped off the counter and back into the carp box and was butchered by Nivell and sold.

You must read the whole story.
Who needs ‘reality’ TV?

And if the tadpoles start to speak apocalyptic aphorisms, I promise not to kill them. Maybe. Embot, do you remember where Daddy keeps the machete?