Because it doesn't look right on the front porch. In May. (Kinda like the Halloween decorations that appeared around Valentine's Day. Or was it Christmas? All I remember is that it was so wrong. Obviously the Belle Reve Homeowners Association doesn't consider me to be an arbiter of good taste.) I wish I had video of Fran grabbing it and yelling "Not outside. Not outside."* It'll be summering in the garage attic with Santa Claus.
But what would you do if you received a phone call from a child driving in the wilds of southeastern Wisconsin asking if you were interested in a "plastic religious figure" on the side of the road? What would you do?
*Oh, to have the time and energy to suspend it on a zip-line over the back deck. That might put an appropriate damper on inapproriate language around the picnic table.
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